“I don’t want to talk to you”
“You don’t understand what I’m going through”
“Leave me alone”
Are these common expressions mentioned at home? Then there is no doubt you have a teenager.
Many parents would love to see their teenagers well-adjusted, happy, successful and social. That can be a lot to ask for from a teen that is dealing with peer pressure, hormonal changes, social media influences, academic expectations, parental ideals, societal standards and their own process of self-discovery. Being a teenager is clearly no easy task and as a parent, learning to cope with this stressful stage can take a toll. Parents who seek counseling for their teens are headed in the right direction.
Not every therapist or counselor can successfully work with teens. It is important to find a counselor who is skilled and comfortable in working with teenagers. Just like teens think that their parents can’t understand them, their perception is that most adults including counselors have the same mentality. Don’t worry parents, at KIDSology, Inc. we are skilled in a foreign language called… “teenager”.
Teens constantly face many new pressures and may not always react in the best ways to the challenges they encounter. Some of the struggles teens face are a normal part of growing up. In some cases, teens and their families may need extra support and guidance to help them deal with and navigate through these challenges.
Some of the challenges KIDSology, Inc. can help your teen face can be:
-
Teen pregnancy
-
Bullying or abuse
-
Risky sexual behaviors
-
Feelings or thoughts of suicide
-
Developing an illness or disability
-
Using drugs, alcohol or illegal substances
-
Tragic events in the community or the world
-
Changes in mood, weight, appetite, friends, etc
-
Problems at school – academically or behaviorally
-
Violent or illegal behaviors – fighting, stealing, drug possession, etc.
-
Changes in family life – moving, divorce, death or serious illness of a family member
-
The loss of a close friend, girlfriend/boyfriend through death, a breakup, or moving
Step #1: Building Rapport and Trust
Building rapport is key in working with teens. Teenagers don’t engage in counseling the same as adults. Teens see adults as authority figures and a counselor, is an adult, and is just another authority figure. Most teens loathe counseling and view counselors as another authority that is going to tell them what to do, how to do it, when to do it, how they should feel, what to work on and what should matter. Most teens are in counseling only because their parents, teachers, or some other adult who holds a position of authority told them they MUST see a counselor.
Step #2: Communication
Communication should value their opinion, be mutually respectful, clear, and direct. At KIDSology, Inc. we relate to our teens by utilizing stories, metaphors, and analogies that apply to the way they perceive the world. Acknowledging that teenagers are the experts on their life experiences fosters a collaborative relationship with the counselor. This approach allows teens to become a willing participant in the therapeutic process.
Step #3: Listening and Mutual Respect
Teenagers need to feel understood, accepted, and most importantly RESPECTED. They are more likely to talk openly and honestly when they do. The goal of counseling is to create an environment in which your teen opens up and is willing and able to explore the issues or feelings they are dealing with. If given the right environment and a trustworthy recipient, teens enjoy discussing their lives. Teenagers want to have a voice. They want to feel respected, accepted, and feel like their opinion matters. We go a step further and invite teens to teach us. By listening to them we have learned so much!
The most important aspect of therapy is Family Involvement. When parents bring their teens to counseling often it is a last resort because they have tried every which way possible to reach and understand their teen with little success. When parents do take the step of bringing their teen to counseling they want to see results. At KIDSology, Inc. we are confident the results you want to see will happen WITH your participation. All children and teens that enter counseling with us require family participation.
We look forward to helping you and your family. Contact us through our website, by e-mail info@mykidsology.com or directly at (305) 392-0445 to schedule your first appointment.